I just had to share with you what just happened to me…
I saw a table I liked on Craigslist, so I called up the number and asked the man who answered for the measurements. He said he would call me back in a few minutes. So far … everything is normal.
A man of his word, he called back when right in the middle of giving me the measurements, I hear some commotion coming over the line and some woman starts screaming in the background.
I was alarmed and wasn’t sure what was happening. Then the man I was talking to begins screaming (in the receiver) back at the woman in the background and the phone sounds as if it was being tossed around. And then woman gets on the phone.
“YOU HOME-WRECKING bleep (lets say WITCH)!! WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM MY HUSBAND NOW?”
I say the first thing I can get out after my initial shock wears off: “Ummm… a table?”
She doesn’t even listen to me and screeches “I (lets say…) FREAKING HATE YOU!!!!”
Cue Psycho background music as I begin looking around for hidden cameras.
I’m a little stunned and have no idea what to do at this point. Then I hear the man yelling at the woman, trying to explain how I’m just trying to buy their table off their Craigslist ad. “Oh”, says the woman. “So your not after Jim?”
At this point, one side of my brain is telling me to hang up, but the other side is in such shock (and in a dysfunctional way intrigued by the real life soap opera playing out) that my hand just won’t let me hit the end button.
I reply, a little rattled, “I don’t even know who Jim is”
“Your not trying to get with him?” she asks.
“Definitely not” I say.
“So ya still want the table?” she asks.
“Ummm. I think I’ll pass” I say.
“It’s real nice” she say.
“That’s okay, bye” I say. “Oh yeah. Send Jim my love…” (Just kidding about that last line, but it would’ve been sort of funny, eh?)
Dear Lord! There was never a”Sorry I tried to claw your eyeballs out through the phone”, she just went from C-R-A-Z-Y to sweet-as-can-be in about 5 seconds. Wow!
I should have expected, after all of the calls I have made to strangers on Craiglist, that one of them was going to be that lunatic you read about in the news.
It was like I was taking part in a Jerry Springer episode that I didn’t sign up for.
God help the next woman that calls there about that table.
Thank Goodness I didn’t just drive out to their home. I could have been tackled to the ground before the woman realized why I was there.
As just another reminder … never go pick up furniture by yourself.
But now that I’m a blogger, I have a confession … I’m a little glad I didn’t hang up because then I couldn’t share this disturbing, yet awe inspiring, conversation with all of you.
Maybe this is a sign from God that I have enough furniture in my storage room to last me awhile.
Speaking of tables, here is one that I didn’t have to contact an insane person to get. I got this one a a yard sale this summer, and I spruced it up to take to the craft show Saturday. I painted it with DIY turquoise chalkpaint, distressed it, and coated it in clear wax.